Weirdness!

I've been very content with not having more kids. My kids are growing up and moving out and will be starting to have their own families in a year or so. It's kind of nice not having diapers or babies, or getting up at night, diaper bags and stuff like that. I still need a sitter for the younger two, but I CAN leave them, unlike a nursing baby.

I have freedom.

So lately I've been kind of wanting a baby. But don't really. But oh, how I do! No, I don't.

Sam came up to me the other day and said I had a baby in my tummy. No, I don't. He never really paid attention when I was pregnant with Aksel, and he hasn't mentioned it in the two months since Aksel died. But now he put his head to my tummy and said he could hear the baby in my tummy. Weird, huh? Am I pregnant? lol I don't think so. Guess we'll see.

But anyway, I've been looking at some adoption sites lately. I've just been drawn to them. Especially Down's syndrome babies from over seas. I showed a couple to Donnie and he even looked at the site and we were even both drawn to a couple of the same kids. But the price kind of turned us both away. We weren't seriously looking yet, and haven't even talked about adopting for real.

I then looked at local adoption, and found a place that pays all the fees! But none of the kids drew me in. So I just dropped it.

Then last night when I was putting the littles down to bed we read a book that must have been sent by my mom because I've never seen it. (she sends boxes of books to Trinity to read) Trinity handed me the book and I started reading it, having no idea what it was about, but it had a little girl and a ladybug on the cover. It was about little kids in China going to an orphanage to wait for a new mommy and daddy.

Hope-Anne says "Hmmm, ironic, isn't it?" Yes, it is. "You know, just today I prayed about you adopting, and that God would give a sign, and here it is."

Weird, huh?

Not that I am looking into it just yet, but maybe some day. Right now we are busy helping with a church planting in our town and committed to a year of service. That is our baby right now.