Have you ever been stuck on what advice to give to someone? Yep, I'm there. Not sure what is the right thing to do.
There is a teenage boy who likes a girl but isn't involved at the moment. The mother of the girl thinks the boy is great and would like them to be involved in the future. She is including him in everything they do. I don't think the daughter is even doing the inviting, just the mom.
The mom texts the boy, private messages him on facebook, chats with him on facebook, and comments frequently on his facebook status. The daughter has never commented on his facebook, and doesn't private message him at all. Supposedly they do text.
There is nothing in the boys life to indicate he needs an adult mentor, and it isn't that kind of relationship.
Nothing inappropriate in any of that has been found. However, do you think it is inappropriate for an adult woman to be so involved with a teen boy?
The boys mom feels very uneasy with the situation. Her sister even said that she thought something wierd was going on, without even knowing the mom felt weird. Another teenage boy said that it is weird. It isn't just the mom.
What should the mom of the boy do? Should she tell the other mom to stop private messaging the boy? Just let it be since there is nothing to indicate it is a bad relationship? I am at a loss on what to say.
October 19, 2009
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
4 people think my kids are qtpies:
That's a tough one! Some women just can't accept the fact that either a)They can't micro-manage their children's lives or b)They aren't a teenager anymore.
I think I might try to sort of mention it off-handed first and see if she gets the hint.
I'd ask the mom to back-off. Now. Nicely.
If the daughter does eventually like the teen, she doesn't need her mom having a closer relationship with her future husband, than she has. She shouldn't have that pressure of thinking she "has" to like this guy because her mom does, and they've been in contact for so long.
How is the teen going to feel like a man, and the leader in the relationship (eventually) if the girl's mom is doing all the leading for him?
Just my thoughts and opinions.
Well, if she were to level with her that she's not comfortable with the way things are as she sees them, and reason with her as one adult to another, then one of two things should happen. A) She says "Oh, you're right. I didn't see it like that"/"Well, I'm sorry that I made you uncomfortable. I don't want that." and back off to a healthy level. Or B)She'll blow her off and it becomes clear that, at the very least, now it's something to worry about.
Further, I agree wit Workship 100%.
I just thnk it sound freaky! I have 5 girls and there is no way I would do that. is the Mom trying to vicarously live thru her daughter? I would definitely say something and not encourage the relationship with the daughter either. what about the boy? is not bothered by all the attention from the mom? and what does the dad think?
Post a Comment