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Our 7 Qtpies

September 12, 2010

Old, overweight, and pregnant...... is there a funny side?

Just so you know, there is definitely TMI in this post. Men won't want to read this. And I probably don't want you to. I mostly write to moms, and that is who this post is for. As well as for myself, so I remember this stuff and can look back and laugh some day. Some day.

Part of the charm of ladies night out, or just a good time with your close girlfriends, is that you can sit back and complain about the getting old process and commiserate together. It helps you to laugh at the changes you are going through, you know, so you don't have to cry all the time, lol.

I've heard older women talk about how they lose bladder control when they laugh or sneeze. Pregnant women, too. It isn't funny to us, but you know, there really isn't much we can do about it. And even what we can do is limited by the time and money we have left over after giving everything of ourselves to and for our kids. So we laugh. Right?

I am going to journal the next 7 months of this old, overweight pregnancy with honesty and transparency and way too much information.

I am 39 years old. That makes me of "advanced maternal age" in this pregnancy. Supposedly putting me at risk for all sorts of issues. That doesn't worry me, but being old does make things harder. The whole weak bladder thing. Not cool. So when I have to deal with the nasty side effect of pregnancy and puke, I also get to pee my pants. Fun times. Miserable and humiliated.

Plus I am super tired. I've never been so tired! I've been through this whole pregnancy thing a few times, and this tired is a new thing. Why am I so tired? I'm just too old for this!

I am also overweight. I wasn't even this heavy at 9 months pregnant with my first few pregnancies. I'm only 5'4" and 40+lbs overweight. And I think half of that weight is in my chest. OK, maybe not half, but my chest is huge. DD is ridiculous on my height. Could be worse, true. However, it isn't funny when I lay on my side or my back and the fat from by chestular area splays up toward my neck. And funny thing is that if something touches my throat area, I puke. So I am being gagged and choked by my own boobs. Yippee. Well, maybe it is a little funny.

Then there is the whole fun of being pregnant. Puking, nauseated, bloated, gaseous, not to mention having to go through exams in private areas, poking, prodding, needles, and CHILD BIRTH. I need to eat, but I hate food. I need protein, but I hate meat. I need to drink, but I hate everything. Nothing sounds good, nothing tastes good, nothing is that good coming back up.

Old, fat, pregnant and miserable. But a little happy and a lot blessed!

5 people think my kids are qtpies:

Unknown said...

So funny I peed my pants! ;)

Oldqueen44 said...

I have a daughter your height who wore a "F"... She just got a boob job and is now a C/D. She is incredibly happy. We had a sun dress party for her. Something she would never consider weraing before because or her chest size.

I will tell her about the gagging yourself with your own boobs. Too funny.

Anonymous said...

I will never again complain about being a barely C.
I had my fourth and last at 39...midsummer. Oh, she is a dear and so will yours be.
Pantiliners to the rescue!

Joyful Noise said...

Too funny - just wait...soon will come the time when you can't stop eating and wish you could. LOL

Anonymous said...

1st, congrats on being pregnant! 2nd, it's definitely not like when we were 20 and pregnant is it?!

I was 41 with my last baby, and although I don't throw up, I was extremely tired and nothing sounded good~ especially if I had to cook it. fortunately the older children can do more and if they live on PBJ and soup, they'll survive.

breast reduction is an option, but then you can never nurse those sweet babies anymore :(

and now my baby is 16 mos old and it was so worth it! we are having so much fun with him!! now, how to get this extra weight off?!? :)